Put it to an end.

I wish I could just turn off all feeling.
I don't want to be sad or mad or happy or hopeful or curious or anything.
I just want it gone.
I'm sick of being nervous and worried.
I'm tired of being scared.
Just make it all stop.
It's making me crazy.
I'm so tired of feeling crazy.
I'm so sick of the inconsistency.
I'm so fucking sick of it.
Why can't I just stick with one emotion for just a little moment.
Why do I always need to feel stressed or nervous or worried?
I just want a break for a couple of days!
But I can't get a break from myself.
And that has always been the problem.

Bleh...

Hmmm.

I passed drivers ed today.
Haha -10.
I kept forgetting to check my blind spot.
And he was just grumpy today...

I need to walk more.
I'm just so lazy...
And then when I finally decide to go I realize that I have a lot to do...

So. I am going to clean my room.
And if my mother is not home I will clean upstairs also. :)
And I will read for a bit.
And I will do my online classes.
Maybe go on a walk?
Ah... This seems to ambitious.
Haha... :)
I need to do it.
I will.
Hopefully.

Good afternoon...ish.
:)
Spread the smiles.
Feel better.
Drink coffee. Or Dr. Pepper.
Yummy.
Eat mac and cheese.
Yumm.
Go on a walk?
Okay.
I'm done now. :)