Neglect

I want someone to rip me apart.
So that all this evil can escape.
So it will stop hurting me.
Even though there is a chance that being ripped apart would just bring more evil to feast...
It's worth a chance.

I'm not okay.
But I want to do it on my own.
I don't need to feel helpless.
I have to be able to solve my problems on my own.
I want to be able to do all of it.
All on my own.
And I can't.
I can't.
I'm not good enough.
Not at all.
I'm not pretty enough.
Or smart enough.
Or important.
Or anything.
I just can't.
I'm just like everyone else.
Lost in puzzles that I made myself.
Lost in a maze I entered by my own choice.
Lost and scared.
Forgotten and unimportant.
It's just how it is.
Just how it's been.
And how it will be.
I just don't know how to do anything but cause myself harm.
Can't do any good no matter how I wish I could.
All of it is just simply a waste.

This is silly.
This is a waste.

Let's just say it's not for any of you.
It's just so I can maybe think it less in my mind.
Though that's no excuse.
So I guess I'm waiting for the hate or neglect.
Expect nothing more.

I say this every time, because I think you should listen, so I say it till you won't forget.
Spread the smiles.